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I was a bull for the couple two doors down from me. You know what that is?” “No.” He started making exaggerated motions while talking. “Means I would get in there, and we’d have a couple of drinks together—all three of us. And then, the wife would make her man sit in a chair, and she’d give him a little strip tease. Then she would blow me, right there in front of him. And after that, I would fuck her for half an hour, while he watched.” “What the hell? She would make him watch that?” “It’s a fetish, mate. The guy’s just as into it as the girl.” “I don’t think I could ever do something like that.” “Well, her man would also send her over to my place by herself—sometimes as the warm up, sometimes to finish her off. It depended on their mood. Guys get off on the idea of their woman being so sex crazed that she needs more than one man to satisfy her. They don’t worry that they’re missing out. They feel like they’re giving their girl a treat to fuck other guys. It makes them proud.” “You. "I hear you're in the market for a house," my mother said."Really? Where did you hear that?" Are you? Is it true?" Yes. It's true. How did you hear about it already?" I was doubly irritated now. Did my mother have my apartment bugged, or something?"Your real estate agent's boss is the spouse of one of my law partners," she said. "I have connections everywhere." Evidently." I resolved to chew, hard, on my agent's ear about this, but I suppose her boss -- Mr. (or Mrs.) Spouse-of-Law-Partner, was the real culprit."Why the sudden interest in real estate?" Mom wanted to know."Stock market's in the toilet. Thought it would be a good investment." Does it mean you're planning to stay around the area, long-term? Go to grad school here, maybe?" Actually, Mother, I was thinking about following in your Ferragamos, and going to law school."Now, why did I tell her that? Law school for me was, at best, a year away. Telling Mom about it now was premature, and it would just get her.
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